change

the more I grow up, the more I learn about myself. this probably seems like a very obvious statement, but it delights me. I like realizing things about me...it makes me more comfortable in my own skin.

I used to think I hated change. just talk of graduations, moving, last days at work, etc. could bring me to tears. I even get a little emotional when semesters change, a friend's pet dies or I have to change apartments in the same town. I mean, I've been known to cry when saying goodbye to old cars. but really...I think change and I have a love-hate relationship. change is hard. I mean the big kind this time - not the "getting a new car" kind. it can be gut-wrenching and painful and can tear us out of our comfort zones. it can be terrifying. it might mean we no longer have someone (or many someones) we love in our lives on a daily basis - whether they have passed away or are many miles away. but change can also mean growth. it can mean new relationships and experiences. it can mean the start of a new adventure. when I think of changes that were really hard to adjust to, I look at my life prior to that change and wonder what life would be like if I were still in that place. change is necessary - can the transition to college life be difficult? yes, but we can't stay in high school forever. was moving states away from home scary and lonely? yes, but I can see the figurative, not just literal, miles that were traveled from that change and I wouldn't choose to go back. indeed, change causes growth.

change may make me shake in my boots, cry every day for months, induce a miniature panic-attack or all of the above. however, the alternative is NOT changing. remaining stagnant. and while change is scary, not changing and not growing is even scarier.

hmm...who knew? maybe change and I can get along.

this doesn't mean we're BFFs, though. don't go getting all drastic.